Break-ups and the road to healing

I don’t need to explain break-ups or the heart-breaks they bring so let’s cut to the chase and talk about how we can get our broken hearts mended again.


Sometimes, when we experience heart-break, we shut ourselves out from the world and lock ourselves inside a bubble of pain. Doing this is potentially fatal. If it doesn’t cause death in the literal sense it can cause death to other things: certain aspects of your personality, your dreams, your desires, current friendships etc. You have to cry out. But don’t do so just horizontally, cry out vertically.

When you’re down, the best place to look is up. “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” (Psalm 34:18) Test God if you doubt this. I guarantee if you cry out to Him in the humbleness of your heart, He will answer.


Family is great, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Don’t surround yourself with “friends” who aren’t helping you grow. When you’ve hung out with the same people for a couple of years and you’re still doing the same bad things, something is wrong. They aren’t growing up and neither are you. Some people you have to cut because “…bad company corrupts good character,” (1 Corinthians 15:33). 

It doesn’t matter how much fun you have with them or how long you’ve known them. This is about you growing for the better and getting healed. Doing the same things isn’t going to change your situation. You have to change your surroundings, the things that have influence on you, if you want change. Pray about good friends being placed in your path, people who will love you and invest time in you and care for you, pray with you, encourage and build you up, not keep you stagnant. If opportunities arise, go for it. If someone invites you to a church or home Bible study, go for it. You never know what amazing friends you’ll meet.


Once you’ve been blessed with the right people, stay connected to them. Continue hanging out with them, talking to them on the phone, texting, etc. Just stay connected.


Don’t be surprised if after all this happens, or even when it starts to happen, your ex or whatever it was that broke your heart before the healing began, pops up again to say hello. If it does, don’t look back. Turn the other cheek and keep on walkin’, honey. That ex will promise not to break your heart again, but don’t believe it. Don’t even answer the phone! If he’s persistent, CHANGE YOUR NUMBER. Seriously, you cannot fall for that again.

Let your new support know if you’re finding it challenging to turn away from the past. Allow them to help you and to remind you how far you’ve come and to not throw it away for another broken heart. You’re worth more, remember that. You’re a princess and you weren’t brought into this world to get your heart trampled on by men. You were placed here to be loved and to love in return; to love God first and foremost, and then to love people.

If you have a desire to also love and be loved by a man specifically, God will send him your way when the time is right. You don’t have to worry or carry around binoculars anymore. God’s got him.  Put Jesus first and watch how everything else falls into place. A princess being carried in the chariot of the mightiest King, allowing Him to lead the way; it’s a beautiful place to be.

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