Ladies & Gentlemen, don’t cheat on your future spouse.

So many of us fall in love with the wrong person. We get into a relationship with someone (usually someone we’re very attracted to), and in a month or so, we’re in love with them. Then three to six months down the road, we break up and we’re heart-broken. Then we meet another person we’re very attracted to and share common interests with. A few months (maybe a year, or years even), things fall apart with them as well. And the merciless cycle continues.

Here’s my expert advice: DON’T FALL IN LOVE UNTIL YOU ARE CERTAIN IT’S THE PERSON GOD WANTS YOU TO MARRY.

Why, ladies and gentlemen, would you give your heart to someone if you weren’t 100% sure they were the one God appointed for you to marry? Why? There is no logical reason.

I’ve personally done this time and again, and have had four major heart breaks, two of which were by the same guy. That’ll give you nice baggage and a bunch load of unnecessary memories to bring into the relationship God actually wants you to be in. And if you have yet to give your life to God, you’re gonna have wounds and scars that take years to mend, if they ever even mend completely. (Trust me, save yourself years of recovery by giving your life to Jesus. He healed my beat up heart in six days!)

Trust me, waiting isn’t more painful than not waiting and getting your heart-broken multiple times over. Heck, one heart-break is damaging enough, let alone several.

If you’re having anxiety over waiting, the root problem’s a simple one: You have trust issues with God.

You don’t really trust that He’s gonna bring that person to you. So you decide to take matters into your own hands, and get bruised and broken in the process.

So, what you need to do is first pray. Confess this lack of trust and ask God to help you learn to trust Him. Ask Him to help you understand and grasp His insurmountable love for you. Then, get to know Him. I have found that trust-struggles regarding God are almost always a direct link to the person not really knowing who He is.

I will betroth you to Me forever;
Yes, I will betroth you to Me
In righteousness and justice,
In lovingkindness and mercy;
I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness,
And you shall know the Lord. -Hosea 2:19-20

 

God is righteous, He is good, He is just, He is kind and loving, merciful, and faithful. The more you read His infallible Word (Yes, the Bible, if you doubt it’s His Word, do your research on how authentic it is Dead Sea Scrolls, the Green Collection, how there’s 2500 prophecies in it and 2000 of them have already been fulfilled to the letter-no errors), the more you read this amazing book He inspired, the stronger your trust in Him will become, and you will sleep sweetly, knowing He’s got you on every front.

Wait for that person. Know your worth.

-Natasha

Posted by

Daughter of the King, married to a prince. Writer, actress, and my husband's side-kick filmmaker.

5 thoughts on “Ladies & Gentlemen, don’t cheat on your future spouse.

  1. I appreciate all that you are saying, but I just can’t understand how your heart was healed in six days. As someone who’s has been in a heartbreaking situation that literally ripped me apart, the Lord definitely healed my heart but not in days. It took multiple months. Through out this time I continued to contact the Lord and he was able to dispense more of himself into my being. Are you sure that you’re not mistaking meeting Jonathan for this “healing in 6 days”? I know you read the bible in a quick amount of time, but still. That just doesn’t sound right. Also, seeing how you had 53 boyfriends, how were you sure that God wanted you to marry the next guy you met? None of this makes sense.

    1. I didn’t meet Jonathan until after the six days.

      If God made the world in six days, trust me, He can heal a broken heart in six days. He can do anything. His Word says in Jeremiah 32:37, “Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is there anything too hard for Me?”

      God says He rewards those who diligently seek Him. I don’t know if during your heart break that was what you were doing, but that is the outcome of one seeking God: healing. I know drug addicts who gave their life to Jesus and were instantly healed of their addiction. But when you really begin to read God’s Word, therein lies the power. Yes there is power in prayer, but in the right kinds of prayer. See some of us aren’t growing or changing much or witnessing the awesome power of God in our lives because we neglect His Word and/or don’t know how to pray according to His will. And the only way you can learn how to pray according to His will, is to discover that will by spending time in His Word. You may have been doing what the Bible calls, “Praying amiss” without even realizing it, or if you weren’t in God’s Word, you weren’t getting to know how amazing and wonderful He is and falling in love with Him while falling out of love with your ex. That is what happened with me. My love for God outgrew my love for my ex and since I was drawing so near to Him, He was drawing near to me, and since He is Love itself, He healed me so quickly. If you believe in love at first sight, then it mustn’t be too hard too believe that one can fall in love with God in days. He did heal me, and you can ask my mom, dad, sister, grandma, and best friend Marilyn, who all thought I had gone a little nuts because it was hard for them to believe how joyful I was after witnessing and knowing of my heart break. My dad was the only one who didn’t think I was too crazy actually, but yes, Nicola, I was healed in six days.

      And I was certain God wanted me to marry Jonathan because I sought Him seriously in prayer and He answered me. I’m actually revising my book now and it should be published within two months or so so I don’t wanna give away all the amazing confirmations God gave me that Jonathan was the man he wanted me to marry, but I’ll give you one. I had prayed, begged actually, for God to reveal if Jonathan was the one, and I flung my Bible open to anything and it was Isaiah 43:19. God’s Holy Spirit told me to read it in my Amplified Bible which was conveniently on the night table my eyes landed on, and when I read it through to verse 21, this is what it said:

      19 Behold, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs forth; do you not perceive and know it and will you not give heed to it? I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.
      20 The beasts of the field honor Me, the jackals and the ostriches, because I give waters in the wilderness and rivers in the desert, to give drink to My people, My chosen,
      21 The people I formed for Myself, that they may set forth My praise [and they shall do it].

      Despite the fact that it said “My chosen” there was a lot more here that spoke to me regarding Jonathan and I detail it in my book. But it doesn’t end there. We took premarital classes at our church and the very first class, out of over 31,100 verses in the Bible, the pastor opens up with literally this exact passage.

      Again, there were other confirmations that may seem unbelievable, but God is God, and there is nothing too hard for Him.

  2. Sorry for the late response, Natasha. I’ve been quite busy at work.
    I think I’d be more clear if I put what I am trying to say in points.
    First, I realize you didn’t meet Jonathan until after the 6 days, but did you meet him right after Day 6?
    1. Yes, the Lord can do ALL things. Amen, he created the world in 6 days. Sure, he can cause people to overcome many things in there life, but it’s not going to be the same case for everyone.

    “God says He rewards those who diligently seek Him. I don’t know if during your heart break that was what you were doing, but that is the outcome of one seeking God”

    Trust me, I am one who has loved the Lord my whole life. Matt 6:33 says ” But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all things will be added unto you”.

    Seeking the Lord’s kingdom, is seeking the Lord’s hearts desire, not our own. That doesn’t mean that when we start seeking the Lord, all these wonderful, miraculous things are going to start happening left and right. But all the Lords promised will be given to us. To think that we seek the Lord just so we can have out own self-gain is selfish.

    The fact that it took months for my broken heart to heal has nothing to do with how I sought the Lord at the time. Like I said before, I’ve been in love with the Lord my entire life. However, I am thankful for the heartbreak I went through because the Lord was able to wrought more of his nature into me, therefore allowing more of my natural self to be crossed out. If you were wondering, I’ve now married for two years. I met my husband over 5 years ago . We were friends for a few years and then started courting a couple years after college and got married when i finished law school and when he received his MBA. He is a man of God and we both serve the Lord together on college campuses during our free time preaching the gospel.

    Think of someone who accidentally cuts their finger on a piece of paper. It hurts right? But a paper cut heals quickly. Is the pain of a paper cut equivalent to breaking an arm or a leg? Not at all! But our being heals by not by time, but by the speed of life.

    This makes me wonder how heart broken you were. Not to bash you or anything, but most of the young girls on this website cannot relate to you by having 53 bfs. What made the last heartbreak so different? Also, I’d believe after having that many relationships you’d be numb to the disappointment you were exposing yourself to. I just wonder how you could have known Jonathan was the right man. Also, seeing that you were a young age of 20, that makes me question your story even more. That’s very young to get married. I also feel like you’re using your book as a way to get money from your audience. You keep telling me to wait for this book that you’re writing but I just read the blog because a friend of mine is a subscriber and forwarded me an email.

    I think this is just portraying the wrong message. Someone who engaged in a plethora of relationships, didn’t completely save herself before marriage (oral counts) , and got married so young without the completion of education only to try to lure young ones to buy a book in attempts to earn money and compensate for not going to college….what kind of testimony is this?

    1. I understand busyness, no worries. I mention in my blog that 53 includes since Kindergarten. I only really began to want something serious around tenth grade. I started my hunt for the one then. And I readily admit I wasn’t that great of a role model until after I surrendered my heart and will to the Lord. I was not raised in a devoutly Christian home. So I did my own thing and followed my heart (which many of us know is a terrible thing to do). I never read my Bible, wasn’t going to church, and so I did what I thought was right. And when I met Dace in 12th grade, I fell hard. This was the guy I finally felt was worthy to give my all to. I almost lost it to him three times, but praise God, it didn’t happen. Ever since the beginning of high school, I had a feeling I wasn’t gonna go to college because I wanted to jump right into acting. By 11th grade I decided I wasn’t going to college, but that I’d move to LA and pursue my dreams of becoming a famous actress. But after my heartbreak, which was very real, and very painful, I surrendered my will and my heart to the Lord. So on February 22nd is when I truly decided to follow and get to know the Lord. When I surrendered my will, I no longer cared to pursue being a famous actress. I gave that up and sought Him. Turns out, He had other plans in mind. He wanted me to write and put my acting on the back burner. The first project He gave me was actually a screenplay. Better than Edward wasn’t laid on my heart until after I began dating Jonathan (yup, dating, because we didn’t start courting unfortunately until four months in). I know Jonathan was the one for several reasons.

      After my heartbreak and healing, a sister told me her experience with a prophet. I was still confused over my last exes, Dace and Chris, thinking one of them might be the one still, but that it just wasn’t the time. So I began praying for God to put a prophet in my path. Less than a week later, I’m at Aventura mall, and I run into an old [not saved] friend who invites me to an “event” that he wasn’t even attending. I go to this event and there’s a prophet there! So at the end of service, no one’s in front of him, so I go up to him and tell him my name and immediately, he pulls me aside and says, “The Spirit of the Lord told me Satan’s been confusing you with relationships, but God said He’s gonna make things clear for you very soon.” After a few more words, he ended with stressing, “Very soon.” I met Jonathan a couple days later.

      Then, there was a time in our relationship where I felt like he was the one, but I wasn’t sure because Jonathan was Catholic and we’d butt heads. So I cried out to God on the situation and He led me to Isaiah 43:19-21 in the Amplified Bible. Fast forward several months later: it’s our first premarital class and the before the lesson begins, the pastor–out of all the passages in the Bible–happens to read exactly Isaiah 43:19-21 regarding seasons in marriage.

      Also, before we took premarital, it was Jonathan’s idea to ask God for confirmation if He wanted us to get married. So, that same day he suggests that, he drops me off at His House Children’s home where I used to volunteer and I go straight to the bathroom and pray, “Lord, please confirm for me if You want me to marry Jonathan. In Jesus name.” So shortly after, I’m sitting in the living room with an infant, when one of the Hatian children (it was after the quake), comes up to me and with what little English she knows says, “For you,” and hands me a card from the game Memory that some of the other children were playing at the dining room table. I look at the card, and it is of a young man with dark brown hair, Jonathan’s length, and green eyes like his, standing beside a life buoy, with the title ‘Life guard’ beneath him. At this time, Jonathan was working at CB Smith Park as a life guard!

      Jonathan asked for confirmation as well. So it’s his birthday, and his brothers in Christ at the Bible study he was attending decide to joke around and place his gift in a Disney princess bag. Inside two flaps where the picture of the door is, stood Cinderella and Princess Aurora, not only my two favorite princesses, but the ones Jonathan would call me after, ‘My Aurora, and my Cinderella.’

      So I knew God wanted me to marry Jonathan. And when I first got the idea to write a book, I just wanted to document the romance and how exciting it was to discover the one, but after Jonathan and I got married, and I grew in my walk with the Lord, God changed the idea to a deeper one: sharing my testimony and focusing on glorifying Him and what He did for me. Yes, making some money off of Better than Edward would be nice, we all have to make a living somehow and I am called to be a writer so it’d be cool if I could live off of doing what God has called me to do, but if my book reaches only one person’s life, it was a success. Not everyone is called to go to college. I still know God hasn’t called me to go to college. I know many people who don’t get a college diploma but are very successful. God actually likes using the “base to shame the wise” and the “weak to shame the strong.” I find it miraculous that He’s using someone who didn’t go to college to be a full blown novelist. And He deserves all the praise and glory for that because I don’t have all this education under my belt. It is Him working through me.

    2. Oh yeah! Not to mention before Jonathan started considering proposing (he used to say early on in our relationship that he thought he wouldn’t be ready for marriage until five or six years), I randomly started praying “God, bless me and Jonathan in marriage.” For three days I would add that in my prayer and after the third days Jonathan randomly asks me in the car one night, “So, if we were to ever get married, where would you want to live? What would your dad say?” Etc. etc. And then we asked for confirmations. Oh! And when I went to Romania on a missions trip, God laid on my heart to have me and Jonathan court and get a Spiritual father (someone to hold us accountable and look over our relationship), and God told me that the pastor who was leading the trip was the one He wanted to be our spiritual father, and that man ended up being our spiritual father, and we’d randomly run into him at church (mind you I go to a mega church) and after the third time of running into him, Jonathan was finally ready to start meeting with him and he ended up marrying us and giving us his blessing. And there were more things as well that confirmed Jonathan was the man God wanted me to be with, several answered prayers.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s