Hope Nuggets for Single Girls

Don’t wait for a guy to complete you. No imperfect human can. But the perfect Son of God promises He will fulfill you. Why wait for tomorrow when it isn’t promised to you? Seek Jesus today and discover that life-transforming truth. 

Don’t wait for a guy to come into your life. Pursue Jesus right now and discover how much more amazing He is than any and every guy you’ll ever meet.

Do you wish you were in a loving romantic relationship, getting to know and fall in love with a guy? Well you can do that right now. Open your bible and get to know and fall in love with the perfect guy, Jesus. 

These may sound cliche, but they really shouldn’t. Seriously, who is better than Jesus? Who is more loving, kind, compassionate, incredible, powerful, gentle, and wise? What guy really compares to Jesus? If you’re unsure, then you don’t know Jesus like you think you do. If He hasn’t captivated your heart yet, if He isn’t enough for you, you likely don’t know Him well and thus aren’t experiencing Him very much and not living out this incredible reality that HE IS REAL AND WORDS CAN’T DESCRIBE HOW EPIC HE IS!

But the good news is you don’t have to travel anywhere to meet up with Him. You don’t have to schedule an appointment, ask Him to make time for you. All you have to do is talk to Him, ASK Him to show Himself to you, to help you know Him, and then open up your Bible and seek Him out. Read about Him. See what He said and did. I promise He will impress you like no other guy on this planet ever can. He is worth giving lots of attention to. I pray instead of fixing your eyes on that hot guy from that show you love, or daydreaming about that swoon-worthy character from that book, you look to the REAL-DEAL who offers Himself to you, free of charge, 24/7.

blog_love_natasha

When you’re in a perpetual funk…

Almost everyone annoys you. Your patience is like 0.2%. Regular happiness is a distant memory. I’ve battled this and I still have my bouts with this, but when I remember the truths I’m about to share with you, sisters, I’m able to break through this bulwark before it becomes a vicious cycle.

As Christians, if we think we’re entitled to a bad attitude because we have bad health, we’re gravely mistaken.

“Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”-Philippians 11-14

Whether it be sleep deprivation (which is me every day), physical ailment (I’ve got chronic neck pain; haven’t been to the chiropractor in over three months) or weakness, we cannot allow our emotional state to remain in a place of anger and a funky attitude because, in essence, that’s bitterness, beloved. And the Bible warns:

Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. “-Hebrews 14:14-15

An unchecked bad attitude and bitterness is what begins the erosion of our closest relationships; this is especially true in marriages. If we believe the lie that because we are sick, or weak, or tired continually that we then have the license and permission to be mean, joyless, and emotionally unstable, damaging and hurting those around us because we’re suffering, we are not practicing love, but selfishness. Too many are hurting others because they’re hurting and as Christians, this is point blank unacceptable.

I’m not talking about having a bad day. I’m talking about when your bad day turns into bad weeks and months and years. You’re allowed to be human and experience discouragement and anger. It’s when you let anger give the devil a foothold over your life and remain in that state of being for lengthy periods of time that you’re now being destructive to yourself and others.

Let’s pray for one another and bear one another’s burdens, and not allow our physical weaknesses to cause us to be in a perpetual state of bitterness that abuses those around us. Let us choose to love no matter what state we’re in physically, and when it’s hard to do that, instead of justifying our bad attitudes, let’s confess to one another and humbly ask for prayer. A bad attitude ignored or justified is like radioactive gas to those around us; it’s toxic and destructive. Christians can live in victory, so let’s not accept continually defeated mindsets for if we allow ourselves to be beat down, then we’re useless to help lift others up.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.-1 Corinthians 13:4-7

blog_love_natasha

Whenever someone rejects or hates you, know this…

As a writer–and a human being–there are times when God needs to remind me that no matter how bad or good my writing is, ultimately, it is He who gives favor.

“For you bless the righteous, O Lord; you cover him with favor as with a shield.”-Psalm 5:12

“And God gave Daniel favor and compassion in the sight of the chief of the eunuchs…”-Daniel 1:9

“But the Lord was with Joseph and showed him mercy, and He gave him favor in the sight of the keeper of the prison.”-Genesis 39:21

“The king’s heart is like a stream of water directed by the Lord; he guides it wherever he pleases.”-Proverbs 21:1

 

How good is God? Being accepted or rejected is one less thing we have to worry about because ultimately, God knows how to deal with that. And how about Jesus Himself, literally the only perfect person ever, was even accepted by some while rejected by many others–both in His time in human flesh and to this very day!

Jesus knows rejection firsthand, better than anyone on the planet. He’s experienced it millions of times throughout history, and every single day whenever people refuse to follow Him, but instead, follow themselves or someone else.

Sometimes, it doesn’t matter how good, or kind, or awesome you are, people will still reject you. After Jesus raised up a man who’d been dead for four days there were still people who rejected Him and actually wanted to kill Him! Indeed, some people will never ever be pleased or satisfied with you, and you know what, it doesn’t matter, because when you run to Jesus, when you bow to the perfect King, He accepts you, whoever and wherever you are, and transforms your life with His incredible love. He opens His arms and tells you not to fear people, and reminds you that He knows exactly what being rejected, mocked, belittled, despised, and hated is like, to the point of being murdered! So no matter who rejects or hates you, always remember:

 “If the world hates you, remember that it hated me first. 19 The world would love you as one of its own if you belonged to it, but you are no longer part of the world. I chose you to come out of the world, so it hates you. 20 Do you remember what I told you? ‘A slave is not greater than the master.’ Since they persecuted me, naturally they will persecute you. And if they had listened to me, they would listen to you. 21 They will do all this to you because of me, for they have rejected the one who sent me. 22 They would not be guilty if I had not come and spoken to them. But now they have no excuse for their sin. 23 Anyone who hates me also hates my Father. 24 If I hadn’t done such miraculous signs among them that no one else could do, they would not be guilty. But as it is, they have seen everything I did, yet they still hate me and my Father. 25 This fulfills what is written in their Scriptures[a]: ‘They hated me without cause.’ 

26 “But I will send you the Advocate—the Spirit of truth. He will come to you from the Father and will testify all about me. 27 And you must also testify about me because you have been with me from the beginning of my ministry.”-John 15:18-27

Jesus promises never to forsake us. He has sent everyone who trusts in Him to save them His very own Spirit, to live in them and be with them forever. And when you die, or He returns, He will gather you to Himself, where you will be with Him for all eternity in paradise, surrounded and filled with peace, joy, and love.

“Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? When everything is ready, I will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where I am.”-John 14:1-3

Being Single Is Better Than Being Married

You may be thinking: Giiiirrrllll, what are you talking about? 

Allow me to explain. I just read:

“I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about her earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible. But if a man thinks that he’s treating his fiancée improperly and will inevitably give in to his passion, let him marry her as he wishes. It is not a sin. But if he has decided firmly not to marry and there is no urgency and he can control his passion, he does well not to marry. So the person who marries his fiancée does well, and the person who doesn’t marry does even better. A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. But in my opinion it would be better for her to stay single, and I think I am giving you counsel from God’s Spirit when I say this.”-‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭7:32-40‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Single sister, do you believe this? If not, what idea about marriage is preventing you? 

Ask yourself. Is it the desire for a special romance? The sense of being wanted? Feeling beautiful? 

These desires aren’t necessarily evil, but they can be selfish and misplaced. Do you know these longings can be satisfied by Jesus? Do you believe that? If you don’t, then you haven’t experienced Him fulfilling those needs yet. And He can. Nothing is too difficult for Him and He actually desires to! He desires you.

Do you know that He designed you, weaved you together while you were created in your mother’s womb? 

When no one had yet to lay eyes on you, His eyes were on you. He literally was forming you. And even beyond growing your body from a fertilized “egg” to a human body with limbs and a brain, He was giving you specific personality traits that would aid in accomplishing His will for you. 

You Then He breathed on you. Literally breathed His own breath of life into you and with that breath, gave you an eternal spirit. That spirit remained with you from the moment He gave you life in the womb onward. 

Your unique, everlasting spirit reminds you there’s more to life, that there is a hereafter. That there’s something, someone bigger than you out there. It’s a “God-shaped” hole that can only be filled by the One who gave it to you. 

He is a romantic God. He is the Creator of love. Not Hollywood. Not man. The bible says God Himself is love. Love started with Him and it comes from Him. 

He is the first to rescue a man and a woman in distress. He is the Savior. He is a Prince. He is a King. He is a Father. He is a Husband. The bible says all of this about Him. 

So if you believe the bible is true, then choose to believe He is these things for you. Ask Him to show you He is. Ask Him to help you believe this. If there is one thing I’ve learned from my eight years of following Jesus is that He hears and answers. 

Don’t let the devil distract you with the cheap counterfeit version of Love Himself through romance novels and films, or your girlfriends’ relationships and flings.

Open your bible, go to the New Testament and let Jesus show you what real love looks like and how much He loves you

If you give Him a chance to woo you, you will become ever stronger, and more confident and content in your relationship with Him and His love for you. Then you won’t be so down about your singleness. You wil have joy despite it. He did that for me and He can do that for you.

Much love,
Natasha

Why You’re Not “Manifesting Your Godly Man”

I recently watched a video from a sister I believe was well-intentioned. She was offering advice to single women on how to “manifest their godly man,” i.e., their future husbands. Her advice included things you could do and certain types of “energy” you can put out there to “attract” a godly man.

There’s several things wrong with her advice. For one, energy is super new age and it’s arbitrary and I think she’s definitely misusing the term by trying to fit it into a biblical context. It’s not about energy, it’s about God’s will and your obedience. Period. I’ll expound on that in a moment.

She mentioned how being the most confident woman in the room can attract your godly man, and how you want a man with “swag.” Here’s what she didn’t realize she actually did: she created a straw-man of what a godly guy is. She put all of God’s sons into a box that fit HER type and is trying to use what worked for HER in getting HER man for YOU and YOUR future man. But not every man exudes “swag” which, in my opinion, can be anything from cockiness,  to worldliness, to being fashionable, or metro-sexual.

Not every man of God has “swag” and not every woman of God likes “swag.” Some women of God like farmer-types, or biker-types, or geeky-types, which, even types shouldn’t matter as much as his godly character should.

Not every man is attracted to super confident, out there, loud or whatever she means by “the most confident woman in the room.” Some men are drawn to quiet, mysterious women. Some men are attracted to a woman who doesn’t even realize how beautiful she is. Some men like the Ruths who are sweaty and dirty, serving the Lord out on the ministry field. You don’t have to do X,Y,Z methods, or change your personality and appearance to attract a godly husband.

Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.”-Proverbs 31:30

I have met married women who are so humble, so gentle, and certainly don’t come across as “the most confident woman in the room,” and their husbands ADORE them.

So if you are not supremely confident, or extroverted, don’t beat yourself up or think you’re doing the wrong things and that’s why no man has noticed you.

What if you haven’t received a godly husband yet because you haven’t attained “godliness with contentment?” Or haven’t been faithful with the little God has given you, so He is waiting until you’re faithful to give you more (a husband and a family)? Or what if God prefers you to be single?

At the end of the day, the most important thing is just being content in Christ alone–your Spiritual Husband–before receiving an earthly husband. Because if you aren’t content with Christ, what makes you think you’ll be content with an imperfect, broken son of His?

My advice: learn to be content and thankful. Don’t covet what you don’t have, but be grateful for all that you do have. Be open to God’s will and whether He wants you to be married or not, always remember:

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”-Romans 12:2

Jesus Loves Me so Don’t Judge Me

“I have stretched out My hands all day long to a rebellious people, Who walk in a way that is not good, According to their own thoughts; A people who provoke Me to anger continually to My face…”
‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭65:2-3‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

The bible says God doesn’t change; He is steadfast, eternally the same. His character has always hated evil and loved good, and it always will. There are things we do that provoke Him to anger continually. Indeed, God loves us, but hates the sin we commit. To use, “He loves me,” as a defense or justification for not repenting of what He calls sin and what He hates, is to trample underfoot His sacrifice on the cross for your sins.

“For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a certain fearful expectation of judgment, and fiery indignation which will devour the adversaries. Anyone who has rejected Moses’ law dies without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. Of how much worse punishment, do you suppose, will he be thought worthy who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, counted the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified a common thing, and insulted the Spirit of grace? For we know Him who said, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. And again, “The LORD will judge His people.” It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.”
‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭10:26-31‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

I know way too many Millennial Christians who use the, “Jesus loves me,” tactic to fool themselves and feel okay about engaging in sin. They don’t want to humble themselves and repent: they want heaven, God’s acceptance, and their sin. But Christ is a sword-bearer who demands a sharp divide and says those who love the world make themselves His enemy. For us to think this holy God who hated sin so much He sent His Son to be brutally punished for it and die in order to cleanse those who would later choose to trust in Jesus and repent, is to create your own false version of God; a god of your own understanding that is cool with whatever you do and accepts you anyway; an unholy god, opposite to the one in the bible. If your god doesn’t care if you sin, then don’t call him Jesus. Don’t blaspheme and lie about the holy character of God and deceive others into following your false version because you’ll just be heaping up even more judgement for yourself in the end.

My prayer is that some, even just one person reading this will admit to themselves and God that they’ve been making excuses for their sin and creating their own god that makes them comfortable and not accountable to change. That you would realize that your god is fake and powerless and that you clinging to this false idol of Jesus will only harm you and others. Christ offers so many glorious things in exchange for our repentance: forgiveness, fellowship with Him, power to transform and help others change. He gives us power over demons, power over satan. But you give all that up when you choose to deny holiness and cling to your sins.

There is nothing more delightful than experiencing Jesus FOR REAL. Because getting emotional when you sing at church doesn’t mean you’ve experienced Him, and experiencing Him goes way beyond that and overflows into every area of your life. It is not mere feelings and emotional highs, it is undeniable evidence of Him transforming you, leading you, speaking to you, teaching you, answering you, helping you.

If you’re not experiencing increasing holiness and power over the sins in your life, if you’re not experiencing a greater desire for Jesus and His truth and a lesser and lesser desire and eventual hatred of sin, then you don’t have a real, surrendered, right relationship with Him. You are not His follower, you’re just His fan who visits Him at church, but doesn’t seek to obey Him. You’re not a child of God, you’re sorta religious. And what a tragedy, when Christ calls us to such a more meaningful and incredible life; to true life. You have no idea what you’re missing out on and that is why you’re holding onto the sins in your life rather than forsaking them and knowing following Jesus is SO much worthier and better for you and others.

It angers God and breaks His heart, and as someone who loves God and people, I’m telling you truthfully, He does not accept you if you continue to love sin. He just does not. This is not Natasha’s teaching, it’s the bible’s. And if you’re a professing Christian, you’re supposed to believe and seek to obey that book; not just listen to the parts that are nice and easy to accept; you don’t just accept as much of Jesus as you’re comfortable with, you let go and surrender all to Him and embrace everything He desires for you. And then your life will really begin.