When Your Man Turns Into the Green Goblin

I went into my bedroom to put my two-month-old, Viera, to sleep, leaving a cup of green smoothie on the table. My three-year-old, Arrow, tagged along, playing on my bed. Five minutes later, I wondered what my 22-month-old, Braven, was doing. He’d gotten awfully quiet. I lay my baby down and had Arrow join me to catch up on Braven. I glanced around our 1,099 sq foot apartment. “Braven, where are you?”

No response.

“Braven?”

But before I could begin panicking, I spotted him beneath our dining table. Green smoothie soaked his blonde curls and hands, and painted his face. And he smeared the smoothie across the table and on a chair for good measure. Evidence:

And it hit me: It only took five minutes for my middle-child to turn into the Green Goblin. And how many women can say the same regarding their boyfriend or husband?

In the beginning of your relationship, perhaps for the first six months, he’s Mr. Osborne, confident and charming, but then somewhere along the line he starts becoming jealous, controlling, manipulating, verbally abusive perhaps, or a heavy drinker. And then one day, you realize your Mr. Osborne has become the evil Green Goblin.

“How could I have missed it?” You wonder. But alas, here you are, and the question now is: “What do I do about it?” Hopefully, this short advice will help.

When to Spider-Man kick your Green Goblin to the curb

If you’re a girlfriend, i.e, you’re not a wife, but your boyfriend becomes a disrespectful, name-calling bully, or a liar, or a cheat, he’s gotta go.

Now Christian sister, you know how God is all-knowing and can tell the future? Statistics show that unmarried women living with a boyfriend (having sex) are a lot more likely to experience physical abuse, suicide, and a higher divorce rate.

God, in His goodness, kindness and most importantly, from love, commands His children not to fornicate (have premarital sex). The cost of engaging in that kind of sexual immorality is the kingdom of heaven itself. It’s serious. God is super holy and though He loves you beyond comprehension, there’s certain sins He absolutely cannot tolerate, just as I myself, as a much less holy mother, will not tolerate certain sins in my home.

So being children of God, He does have expectations and does still punish those He has accepted in Christ. My encouragement is that if you’re in a sexual relationship, to repent by telling your guy he needs to respect you or you’re out.

Indeed, as 1 Corinthians 13:4 says, “Love suffer long.” If your boyfriend really loves you, he can suffer a while until he’s honorable and mature enough to make you his wife. (Click to Tweet)

When You’re Married to a Green Goblin

Christian wife, I know it hurts, but you also have to long-suffer for your husband (but if he’s physically abusive, get out and get safe). But if you’re disappointed in the man he’s become, I ask you to role play. If you were the one really struggling, would you want him to give up on you, or would you hope he’d keep his promise to be with you through good times and in bad? God sees the future, remember? Apparently, married couples who stick it out, even if it’s years of suffering, end up happier than those who chose divorce.

It’s all a matter of truly trusting God versus just saying you do. God wants us to love even our own enemies, and Paul exhorts the Christian spouse who has an unbelieving wife or husband to stick it out: your example could be used by God to bring that person to Christ, and nonetheless, your children will be made holy because of your godliness.

I remember how long God put up with me loving and idolizing guys and relationships and it humbles me. Think of how long God has and still does put up with you and all of your sin. And if you’ve placed your trust in Christ, you are way stronger than Spider-Man for, “He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.” (1 John 4:4)

Christ in you is stronger than your husband’s sins and failures, and stronger than Satan, who wants to destroy the both of you, starting with your marriage. (Click to Tweet)

For when two are in agreement in Christ, they are a serious force to be reckoned with: “On this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell will not prevail against it.” (Matthew 16:18)

Two Christians can storm the gates of hell, tearing down its stronghold on others, and set captives free.

Satan is it out to steal, kill and destroy everyone, but especially the Christian, and that includes your husband. (Click to Tweet)

Beg Jesus to fill you and strengthen you so you can stop fighting against your husband and instead, be the superhero who fights for him. (Click to Tweet)

And who but God knows when that Green Goblin of yours will change again, and this time, transforming into the man of Christ God wants him to be.


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Me and Sir Jonathan’s TRUE supernatural love story is now on Wattpad!

I quickly tossed the bags in a bin by the counter as Chris did the same, and then turned to leave.

“Wait,” he said.

I halted, my heart beginning to pound, and then slowly faced him. He stepped forward, his deep, brown eyes rapt on me. And without any more warning, he took my face in his hands and pressed his supple lips against mine. My muscles tensed and I froze. Is this really happening right now? I closed my eyes, even though doing so felt like a crime. His kiss held much of the same weakening effect it had on me last time, but anxiety combated some of it. The fear of getting hurt again gripped me just as much as his kiss did.

After a very long moment he released me. “I really like you, Natasha…a lot.”

I blinked at him, my tongue still frozen. Thoughts fumbled around my mind in a drunken stupor despite having not drank. Did he just say-but how-I thought he-Heat filled my cheeks as I smiled. Maybe now isn’t the time to process Chris’s antics. He returned the gesture. But surprisingly, it wasn’t that pleased/amused smile. It was…different. It looked tender, genuine…


“You scared me,” I said.

“I’m sorry.” Dace slid his hands onto my hips and kissed me.

I caressed the back of his head, my heartbeat slowing as I pressed my body closer to his. His warm torso felt like stone. I pulled back and peered into his eyes.

“There’s something so mystical about you.” Dace stared with a passion that seared into the depths of me.

“Mystical? How so?”

“Just the way you move or don’t move. There’s a charm about you that I’ve never seen before.”
—-
The Phantom Lover, the Dark Angel, and the Dream Prince.

My name is Natasha, and this is my true, supernatural love story.

The way me and Jonathan came together is nothing short of supernatural. It sounds like a YA fiction novel so I decided why not write it in the style of one? It’s written in first-person point of view, and you’re experiencing my relationships as I experienced them. You get to be in my teenage head, and as if watching a Netflix show unfold, you’ll go on a journey from my first love at seventeen-years-old to meeting my true love at nineteen. But before you get to enjoy my happy ending, strap on your seatbelt, because I take you through the rollercoaster I experienced in the two relationships leading up to my last and present one.

Are you ready?

Start reading my ongoing, true, supernatural love story absolutely free on Wattpad now. 

R-E-S-P-E-C-T Ladies, find out what it should mean to you

Natasha Sapienza

Respect and women. The two words look strange together don’t they? Almost contradictory in the societies we live in today. But my, how desperately they need to mesh. 

Too many women, young and old alike, are embracing disrespect from men. Yeah, you read correctly: too many women are embracing disrespect. Men cuss around us, talk to us like we’re pirates or something, objectify us: “Dang, girl, you got enough booty to satisfy Alexander the Great.” 

And here we are, eating it up, accepting it. Why? Because it temporarily numbs (not satisfies), our desire for attention, affection, and adoration. We as women want to feel pretty, want to feel wanted, desired. What we don’t know is that our deepest longing, love, cannot and will not be satisfied by men making us objects and using us. So, who can quench this insatiable thirst for love and attention?

Precious lady, may I introduce…

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What You Hope and Dream For Doesn’t Really Matter in Light of…

Christian, what matters more than what God will do for us in this temporal life is what He’s already done for us in eternity.

We may be desiring and hoping God does some things in this earthly realm; we want a certain job or opportunity; we want a degree of success; we want a husband, a family; but if those things never happen, can we remember and trust that Jesus is sitting at the right hand of God on a throne, and awaits to embrace us forevermore? That He Himself will wipe away every tear from our eyes and we will NEVER have to worry or experience pain again? Evil people won’t be able to harm us anymore, disappointments will no longer exist, unfulfilled hopes won’t matter at all because we are living and seeing things so amazing they’re indescribable with human words.

“What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,
    nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him”— these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit. For the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God.- 1 Corinthians 2:9-10

So instead of longing and hoping for something that’s temporary, something that won’t last forever, why not focus more on what’s already been given to us, on the incredible blessings and eternal promises we already possess?

Not familiar with what those things are? Get into your Bible. Read the book of Ephesians and check out all the “spiritual blessings in the heavenly realms” that God the Father through Christ Jesus has blessed us with. It’s awesome and really blows away any earthly hopes we can come up with.

My prayer is that we begin to want earthly hopes and dreams less and less, and rejoice in the eternal gifts and inheritance we received once we gave our hearts and minds–our lives–to Jesus. But there is no rejoicing if you’re unaware of what you have. So go on and begin discovering today. ❤

Ladies: Know Your Worth!!!

An oldie, but a goodie.

Natasha Sapienza

So, I was reading some of this book called “For Young Women Only” and they were interviewing a number of guys to reveal their thoughts in regards to us ladies.  One of the questions went like this,

“Imagine you’re in math class.  A girl with a nice figure in shorts and a spaghetti strap top goes to the board to  answer a question.   She’s not showing off her body- she’s just wearing the usual clothes from A& F.  What’s going on in your mind while she works out the problem?”

Here is what a few of, the author says to be decent guys, most of whom are already in a relationship, had to say.

“Nice body.”

“I hope she gets to work out all the problems on the board today.”

“I wonder what underwear she’s wearing.”

(Next guy, overhearing), “…or if she’s wearing underwear.”

“I’m thinking…is she a virgin?”

“If I’m not careful…

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Author Interview: Natasha Sapienza and Prodigy Prince

Why Words Work

Natasha Sapienza is a writer, actress, Christian, blogger and Youtuber. She is super passionate about relationships; when she isn’t helping her husband with his filmaking, or raising her two sons Arrow and Braven, she is encouraging women by teaching them confidence, self-respect, and relationship advice.

While she has three non-fiction e-books under her belt, Prodigy Prince is her first fictional novel. What’s it about, you ask?

Synopsis

At seventeen, all Prince Nuelle had ever known was safety and peace while living in the Supreme Palace of Zephoris.

But one night, his older brother, Tane, defies their father by traveling to a cursed land. Now Nuelle holds the signet-ring and carries more responsibility than even Tane bore. Thrust from the palace and sent to a knight-building academy, Nuelle must discover his purpose for the entire kingdom’s sake.

From his place of banishment, Prince Antikai has been exacting revenge through fear and…

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Don’t let exhaustion make you believe you’re depressed.

I’ve been in a funk. But wait, a little backstory first. I’m usually a bubbly, joyful, passion-infused Cubana (like this).

I strike up convos with perfect strangers without feeling the least bit awkward. I’m energized by going out and being around people. I’m smiley, love  making others smile and laugh, and I make friends easily.

But not so much lately. I’ve been discouraged, irritable, and extra impatient. I hadn’t even the drive to turn up my worship music in the morning and sing to the Lord which I have done daily for at least eight years. And Jesus is my greatest passion and joy. I love and enjoy Him more than anything or anyone. So not spending that time delighting myself in Him is also very out of my norm.

Well, my recently turned one-year-old still wakes up every night at least twice, once at best. In addition to the times I get up to use the restroom, I’m waking up at least three times a night every night, and stubbornly going to bed around or after midnight each night, and then typically getting awakened around 8:30am the latest. Now in retrospect, that’s pretty bad. We need supposedly at least six hours of uninterrupted rest which I never get. After a while, that bad sleep will wear you down (plus I’m hormonal).

But last night, I went to bed around 10:30am, and Braven only woke once, and I didn’t get awoken as early as usual. And I feel so refreshed and more like my usual, happier self.

Sometimes, we just need to rest.

I’m reminded of Elijah the prophet. He was in a pretty bad mood and feeling quite low and down about life at one point:

“Then he went on alone into the wilderness, traveling all day. He sat down under a solitary broom tree and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors who have already died.””
‭‭1 Kings‬ ‭19:4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

He was afraid and just wanted to be away from everyone. He was on the run and very weary. But God told him to eat and drink. And then he was strengthened and continued on. He brought this complaint to God and God spoke the truth to him, the reality of the situation, because in Elijah’s weariness and crankiness, he wasn’t seeing clearly. He felt alone and thought all was lost, but actually:

“[Elijah] replied again, “I have zealously served the Lord God Almighty. But the people of Israel have broken their covenant with you, torn down your altars, and killed every one of your prophets. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me, too.” Then the Lord told him, “Go back the same way you came, and travel to the wilderness of Damascus. When you arrive there, anoint Hazael to be king of Aram. Then anoint Jehu grandson of Nimshi to be king of Israel, and anoint Elisha son of Shaphat from the town of Abel-meholah to replace you as my prophet. Anyone who escapes from Hazael will be killed by Jehu, and those who escape Jehu will be killed by Elisha! Yet I will preserve 7,000 others in Israel who have never bowed down to Baal or kissed him!””
‭‭1 Kings‬ ‭19:14-18‬ ‭NLT‬‬

The reality, the truth was that Elijah wasn’t alone. He was tired and weary, and certainly downcast by all the bad things happening around and to him.

So not that physical rest is the be all, end all, but it definitely helps us to stop, rejuvenate, and most of all, get alone with God so we can hear and be refreshed by the truth.

Whatever circumstances we find ourselves in, we can often misinterpret the reality of our situation and just be totally discouraged by it. But God knows the truth of the matter and when we just rest and bring our cares to Him, He is faithful to revive us every time.

But getting to that place is a fight. It’s sometimes an uphill battle, especially when you’re sleep deprived. Elijah traveled in that wilderness all day and was drained, but when he was able to get alone with God, his attitude changed and he was able to snap out of his funk.

My prayer and hope for you today is that if you’re drained and feeling down, get some rest and take time to hear from God in His word and in prayer. He’s always near to us, but sometimes, we’re running past or all around Him rather than to Him, and we are burned out. Jesus said:

“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.””
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭11:28-30‬ ‭NLT‬‬

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