Dear Ex, I Never Really Loved You

Worldly “love” comes natural. It’s that Eros “love.” It’s erotic, sensual, and highly appeals to the flesh and the emotions. I’ve fallen in this kind of “love” with several guys. And the more physically and emotionally intimate I was with the guy, the more “in love” I thought I was.

No no. I didn’t think I was in love. I was convinced I was in love. But praise Jesus, His Spirit taught me what real love looks like.

See, the Eros love is how people who don’t truly know Christ love. They do not have His Spirit within them, so they love in a purely human and unspiritual way. This love is broken, limited, and extremely harmful. This love is desperately selfish, even when it looks like it isn’t. This love craves what the other person has to give; their attention, their affection, their adoration, their body. This love stems from the heart that is consumed with Self. A heart that is concerned about its own happiness, not the other’s true well-being. And that is why it is dangerous. Because it is not pure love. It is earthly, sensual—dare I say—demonic.

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?-Jeremiah 17:9

If before surrendering to Christ, the human heart is deceitful and desperately wicked how on earth can it deny its true nature and love another in a pure way? A godly way? The answer is simple: it can’t.

But when a heart is given to Christ and regenerated by the indwelling of His Holy Spirit, now this heart can love in the agape way. The unconditional, selfless, pure, sacrificial way.

Firstly, the regenerated heart is no longer seeking to please Self, but God. This new heart prompts the Christian to delve into the Scriptures and get to know God’s heart. This heart is powerful because the Holy Spirit now lives within it and causes it to be like and obey God.

Before I surrendered my heart to Christ on February 22nd, 2009, I truly thought I loved my ex more than anyone. I believed that because I felt such intense burning desire for him, thought about him often, and wanted to see him all the time, I loved him.

This wasn’t love. I was like a human leech, sucking whatever I could out of my ex because it pleased MY flesh. It made ME feel good. I was addicted to him, not in love with him, because like a drug, he gave my flesh a good high.

But after giving my heart to Jesus, things changed. I’ve been married for almost four years (September 10th <3), and hubby and I don’t fight anymore. I mention this first because in so many worldly relationships fights are natural and usually often. Outbursts of wrath is a fruit of the flesh. You get upset because in that moment, your boyfriend isn’t making YOU happy. Your Self acts out because it’s currently not getting a good high.

But with hubby, now of there’s ever any tension, one of us lovingly submits, and the one who was thinking selfishly at the moment quickly repents and there is immediate peace, which is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. I give in to him, he gives in to me, and without a fight. We just lovingly give ourselves and this evades conflict. It’s not all about what I want to do and it’s not all about what Jonathan wants to do. We understand one another and are 99% of the time, gentle toward each other, which is another fruit of the Holy Spirit.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. (‭Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭22-23‬ NKJV)

When two people have the Holy Spirit, and are letting Him lead, this is the outcome. Real love doesn’t have moments of feeling good, it is good. Sacrifice isn’t this painful, horrible notion that is never even conceived of. Sacrifice is given freely because we seek the well-being and benefit of the other—not ourself.

It’s extremely tragic when Christians are in worldly relationships. It begs the question: do you really have the Holy Spirit in you, because the fruits of your relationship are fleshly. They look just like the world, except maybe they attend a weekly service or two together.

My prayer is that Christians in a worldly relationship will repent. It will certainly hurt their selfish flesh, because the relationship can be so pleasing to it at times, but in the long run, they’ll spare not only their souls from judgement (because being in sinful and hurtful relationships isn’t pleasing to God), but will be free to experience true love, agape love. And when you begin loving someone in a Christ-like way, and he or she loves you likewise, you’ll understand what you’ve been missing all this time.

Single Christian Woman: Where’s all the eligible brothers?

Christian lady, ever feel like there’s so many fellow eligible sisters out there, but not quite as many eligible brothers? I have a theory: Christian men (and men in general), are getting increasingly intimidated by us women. As feminism rubs off on us gals who confess Christ as Lord, we simultaneously repel brothers. They may darn well be attracted to us, but they’ll keep commitment out of mind and out of heart because at the end of the day, God made the man (Adam) with a desire to be supported–not competed with. 

So if you’re serious about getting married someday and raising a family, do a mirror check: How am I coming across to my brothers in Christ? Am I intimidating? Do I challenge them with my attitude and words? Do I question or laugh at their insight and discernment? Do I quickly dismiss things they say right to their face, without fully listening and prayerfully considering them first? Am I very judgmental when it comes to them? Am I feisty? Do I speak respectfully, or freely without any reserve or thought to my words? And the most dreaded of all, am I being disrespectful?

If reflecting on whether or not you’re being disrespectful to a brother already has you balking, you’re likely not being pursed or view as “marriage material.” “Submission” and “respect” from women toward men is increasingly taboo and disgraceful among those outside of the Church, but within her, it is rare, beautiful, and attractive. If you disagree just look at these feminists: how many of them are married? And then again, look at the Church, how many of us young women are married? 

Is it all of our faults, no, of course not. But we’d be wise to own our faults and seek to overcome them by the power of the Holy Spirit–especially if we want to get married someday, and most importantly, if we want to please God, who calls His children to be respectful and to honor all.

“As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout,
So is a lovely woman who lacks discretion.”-Proverbs 11:22

“Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel—rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”-1 Peter 3:3-4

Don’t Cheat on Your Future Spouse eBook Giveaway for Honest Review

Hey, ladies! Sooo I wrote a relationship advice book for single Christian gals and I’m giving it away in exchange for an honest review for Amazon and Goodreads. This is the book:

Are you a single Christian waiting for a spouse? Have you tasted the waters of different men or women in search of “the one,” only to walk away thirsty? Is there a best way to prepare for your future husband or wife? 

In this short, easy to grasp eBook, single Christians will learn how to not cheat on their future spouse, and how best to prepare for him or her. 

If you’ve seen Natasha’s “Don’t Cheat On Your Future Spouse” YouTube video and want to have a more in-depth and practical guide on this topic, this book is for you!

If you’re interested in reading it and writing a review, please do let me know and I can email you the eBook. I really look forward to your thoughts!

Dear Sincere Democrats, the Only Candidate Who Can Provide a Utopian Social Democracy

Dear sincere democrats, who truly want the impossible social democracy preached to them by their political leaders who parade themselves as saviors, please read the gospels or at least inquire of Jesus, the only One who can guarantee a perfect utopian society. Unfortunately, on this hell-ridden earth, utopia is impossible. Walls will always need to be built, penitentiaries established, laws and punishments for breaking them, security cameras, guns and a military for self defense, and a host of other protective and defensive measures from those with the free will to choose to hate good, aka God, and hate those made in His image. If you want a social democracy, a 100% safe world with no threats of evil and their attacks, there is a future city that Jesus has been preparing for millennia, the New Jerusalem, aka Zion, with a brand new earth that not one, fellow, fallible sinner in political power can ever offer you.

Here’s some of Jesus’ campaign promises:

“Then Jesus said to them again, “Most assuredly, I say to you, I am the door of the sheep. All who ever came before Me are thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not hear them. I am the door. If anyone enters by Me, he will be saved, and will go in and out and find pasture. The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd gives His life for the sheep. But a hireling, he who is not the shepherd, one who does not own the sheep, sees the wolf coming and leaves the sheep and flees; and the wolf catches the sheep and scatters them. The hireling flees because he is a hireling and does not care about the sheep. I am the good shepherd; and I know My sheep, and am known by My own. As the Father knows Me, even so I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep. And other sheep I have which are not of this fold; them also I must bring, and they will hear My voice; and there will be one flock and one shepherd. “Therefore My Father loves Me, because I lay down My life that I may take it again. No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. This command I have received from My Father.”-John 10:7-18 NKJV

“Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. And where I go you know, and the way you know.” Thomas said to Him, “Lord, we do not know where You are going, and how can we know the way?” Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.-John 14:1-6,

I will not leave you orphans; I will come to you. “A little while longer and the world will see Me no more, but you will see Me. Because I live, you will live also. At that day you will know that I am in My Father, and you in Me, and I in you. He who has My commandments and keeps them, it is he who loves Me. And he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and manifest Myself to him.””-John 18-21 NKJV

#VoteJesusToday

Video: What is Modest Apparel for the Christian Woman?

Modesty has gotten a lot of slack over the last decade, outside–and in–the Church. Is there a standard, and if so, what is it?

If someone tells me she’s feeling suicidal and I encourage her, and hug her, and pray for her, and remind her of comforting Scriptures and she chooses not to kill herself, did my choices impact her decision? If I call someone horrible things and tell him he should kill himself and he does, did my choices impact or influence him?

So…do the clothes you wear impact the choices of others? Why does the Bible say “…that we may be pure and blameless children of God in the midst of a crooked generation?” If we are to be “blameless” does that mean we can be “blamed” at all? The Bible teaches us that our choices have influence. So then…are we somewhat accountable for them?

Ladies, Who Should You Fight For?

Sisters, do you view Jesus as someone totally worth living for, worth listening to and obeying, worth spending time with; worth loving? 

We love because He first loved us. Love literally is not possible in a world where Jesus does not exist. He showed us what love is and it’s Him! Plain and simple: God is love, Jesus and God are one. Outside of them, there is no perfect love. (1 John 4:16-19)

That means there isn’t a single human being on the planet–including yourself–who can “complete” or fulfill or love you sufficiently. 

True love paid the price to forever love you perfectly. Jesus died so if you stopped looking elsewhere for love, and instead trusted in His love, you can be forgiven for every single sin you’ve ever done or thought, and be freely welcomed into heaven where He will faithfully love you for all eternity! 

If He isn’t worthy, then who or what is more worthy than Him? What or who deserves more devotion and attention? 

I’ve been getting this conviction more and more to live to please Jesus. The world, movies, books, TV shows, music, it’s the most popular message out now: you should be pleased, you are number one. Humanism is really all about the human and his or her goodness and worthiness. The problem is, who in the world decides what’s good and why, and who is worthy and why? 

God is the whole reason behind morality. Without God, morality will eventually crumble and decay until there’s nothing left of it. Don’t believe me? Take a look at our society and how much we’ve fallen. We are now becoming evermore what this biblical prophecy described would happen in the last times:

You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!They are the kind who work their way into people’s homes and win the confidence of vulnerable women who are burdened with the guilt of sin and controlled by various desires.(Such women are forever following new teachings, but they are never able to understand the truth.)-2 Timothy 33:1-7

Today I will fight the devil and my own selfish desires that shout, “Live for you! Do what you want!” And instead, I will fight to love and please Jesus. Will you?