Do People Who Commit Suicide Go to Heaven?

Suicide has become a controversial topic. But after watching a film that promoted assisted suicide as a positive thing, I am reminded of the truth that the God of the Bible, that Jesus Christ, is a God of love and hope. And this isn’t a topic that should be side-stepped; this is people’s lives and souls.

I know it’s controversial for good reason: when someone kills himself, it’s a tragedy. It is heartbreaking and pitiable to think someone was so down and out that he couldn’t bear to go on. That is the epitome of tragic and it seems almost worse than if someone had murdered him or her. So I pray I come across gently because I cannot imagine the depth of pain someone feels when a loved one commits suicide. This I write for the sake of those still alive…

When a person ultimately decides to end his or her own life, that person is declaring that there is no hope and that he or she does not love himself. For:

“In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body.”-Ephesians 5:28-30 NLT

To kill one’s own body is an act of self-murder, and ultimately, it is to hate one’s self. And the Bible says:

“Anyone who hates another brother or sister is really a murderer at heart. And you know that murderers don’t have eternal life within them.”-1 John 3:15 NLT

If someone professes to be a Christian, but then murders herself, eternal life, the Holy Spirit, salvation, sadly, did not reside within her heart. Confession of following Christ is one thing, but “fruit” or evidence of following Him is the definitive measure by which we can observe if someone genuinely has eternal life within them—or not.

The Bible warns in Romans 8:5-9:

“For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. 6 For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. 7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to the law of God, nor indeed can be. 8 So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God. 9 But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His.”

Because of these verses and many others that command us to take charge of our minds, of our thought lives, I do not believe mental illness is a disease that is unfixable or something we cannot control. It is the result, the consequence, of not obeying the above Scriptures, which promise that being fleshly “minded” literally leads to death, but if we pursue being “spiritually minded” we will have life and peace–the opposite of suicide and depression.

There are certain sins that lead to eternal spiritual death or destruction. Then there are ones that don’t. Murder happens to be one of those sins that separates us from heaven and there’s only one other eternal place for the unrepentant murderer…hell. There’s no repenting from self-murder because you are no longer living and able to make the choice to trust in Christ and stop murdering…

It’s difficult to hear because we pity the victim of murder, but again, very tragically, the person who kills himself is not only the victim, but the perpetrator. Being the victim of one’s own act of suicide does not negate the fact that you also became your own murderer. And again, murder is a sin that leads to an eternity outside of heaven and in the eternal place of destruction. If you destroy yourself, even if at one time you were a confessing Christian, 1 Corinthians 3:16-17 says you are ultimately destroying God’s temple and there are devastating consequences for that:

“Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy, and you are that temple.”

Our body is God’s temple and it does not belong to us who profess to be Christians:

“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”-1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Killing yourself is also not glorifying to God, but rather, it is the opposite. The Bible is rife with verses about God being the source of our hope and joy, about Him having good plans for us and our future, and that He is the God of all comforts who strengthens the weak.

However, when we commit suicide, we are declaring that none of that is true. And here’s the thing: it IS true! If you do not know it as such, then you are believing lies (and all lies come from Satan), and you are not living in the truth, in the new abundant life Jesus promises to give to those who truly trust in Him:

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”-John 10:10

This doesn’t mean someone who is depressed or suicidal is automatically disqualified. You can go through that dark valley of thoughts, but it’s the person who is eventually overcome by them, who no longer has the faith to keep standing in Christ, but throws in the towel or throws out their faith who is disqualified. That is why Jesus also warns us to endure until the end and to persevere. He declares that only those who “endure until the end” will be saved (Matthew 24:12-13).

I pray this opens your eyes to the sad truth that those who commit suicide may be freed from the torments of this life, but tragically, they have now transported themselves to a place of far worse, eternal torment because they did not know or believe the truth that would have set them free…

I pray if you are believing the lie that suicide is your way out of the pain of this life you will see that according to the Bible, according to Jesus, it is murder and is only a door to far greater torment in hell and there is no escaping that place after you’ve left this world.

As God pleaded with His people before:

“I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing. Therefore choose life, that you and your offspring may live, loving the Lord your God, obeying His voice and holding fast to Him, for He is your life and length of days…”-Deuteronomy 30:19-20

And may you pray this prayer to God the Father in Jesus’ name:

How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me? Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him,” lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.-Psalm 13:2-4

That this reality may be yours:

“You see, we don’t go around preaching about ourselves. We preach that Jesus Christ is Lord, and we ourselves are your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, “Let there be light in the darkness,” has made this light shine in our hearts so we could know the glory of God that is seen in the face of Jesus Christ. We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves. We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies. Yes, we live under constant danger of death because we serve Jesus, so that the life of Jesus will be evident in our dying bodies. So we live in the face of death, but this has resulted in eternal life for you. But we continue to preach because we have the same kind of faith the psalmist had when he said, “I believed in God, so I spoke.” We know that God, who raised the Lord Jesus, will also raise us with Jesus and present us to himself together with you. All of this is for your benefit. And as God’s grace reaches more and more people, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory. That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.”-2 Corinthians 4:5-18 NLT


In Marriage, You Reap What You Sow

There’s a verse that doesn’t get preached often:

“Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.” (Galatians 6:7)

Today in prayer it dawned on me: I need to sow love, and joy, and peace, and fun into my marriage if I truly desire to reap these things.

Marriage is a lifetime investment. But what happens when you stop investing? Just as monthly you’re supposed to put money into a mutual fund so that it will grow all the more, if you want your marriage to grow more enriching, you must put in that which will bring about beautiful growth.

Now, the opposite is just as true, and rather frightening: if you sow anger, bitterness, and disrespect into your marriage, you will most certainly reap the destruction of your relationship.

How many couples continue fighting, only to have the fights get worse and worse, and even more worse, until finally, they throw in the towel on their union and decide to call it quits? Many times, the spouses blame each other, rather than themselves, and because of this wall of pride, their marriage is never restored.

If there’s constant arguments, or boredom, or distance in your marriage, I beg you to ask yourself: what have I been sowing into our relationship? None of us are completely perfect just yet, so even if you sow more good into your marriage than your spouse does, there’s still some bad seeds you’ve been planting. There may be bad seeds you aren’t even aware you are sowing. If you’re serious about honoring God and restoring your marriage, prayer can reveal what we’ve been blinded to.

If you’re married to a non-Christian or a Christian who is throwing bad seeds all over the place, that is still no excuse for you to do the same. You’re just picking up the shovel and helping him dig a grave for your marriage. But check out this awesome promise:

“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.” (I Peter 3:1, 2)

Say whaaaaaaat! Disobedient, ungodly, husbands can be “won” by just watching our godly lifestyle? Yup, sista, that’s what it says, and the Word of God will never pass away.

So my challenge to all of us wives—myself included—is to sow into our marriage what we’ve been wanting our hubby’s to sow. Let’s not cross our arms, lift our chins, and refuse to budge until he does. That’s not how Christians are to operate. Rather, let us respect, even if we aren’t respected. Let us love, even when we aren’t being loved. Let us bring on the fun and the romance despite if hubby hasn’t. Because truth be told, if we chose to follow Christ, that means we embraced suffering for Him as well. If you think following Christ is easy, I don’t know what pastor you’ve been listening to, but Jesus said the way to life is narrow and difficult, and that few find it. O, but the joy that awaits those of us who choose to pick up our cross, deny ourself, and follow Him. We will reap eternal life and riches that our minds can’t even fully grasp at the present.

And as a daughter of God, I have chosen to live for Him, not for myself.

So who’s ready to die to herself and sow goodness into her marriage?



I Am Woman, Now Get On Your Knee And Bow To Me, Man

You can purchase the ebook for your Kindle or free Kindle mobile/ipad app here:

What you are about to read is a powerful excerpt from  my new ebook, I Get What I Want, How women win yet lose with manipulation. This is all based off of my own story because I once was a pro at manipulation. While writing this chapter I thought, “This is so the Holy Spirit.” So glory to God for the wisdom He liberally grants when we ask Him for it! The excerpt starts a little after the opening paragraph. ‘Dace’ was one of my ex-boyfriends.


Notice how when Dace first refused to come over, saying he had to take his brother to his show, that I persisted he come. I did not take no for an answer. This kind of unwavering persistence is what the manipulating woman uses to win what she desires from the man. She insists and insists until the man yields.
I used this tactic so often! Sure, I didn’t scream at the top of my lungs and get in my exes faces, but at times my voice did go up a few octaves, and I did not back down until I got what I wanted. Many times my persistence worked. I almost think we women have more stamina in fighting than men do. It’s usually the woman who keeps yappin’ until the man finally retreats to his bedroom, hangs up the phone, or gives us what we want. This kind of manipulative persistence comes across in many forms: nagging, complaining, arguing, belittling. If you’re a wife, you might know what I’m talking about. You want your hubby to take the trash out, or do some other trivial chore so you nag him until the task is completed. Then you get offended when he reacts to you coldly or answers back with attitude. You might respond, ‘Well I’ve already asked you to do it three times.’ You might even throw in, ‘You’re being so lazy,’ which is belittling to the man and many times he’s just tired from work.
Side note: your husband isn’t the enemy. If he truly is lazy, just pray for him. Understand that the real Enemy strongly desires to oppress your husband, to castrate him, to strip away his confidence and make him unfit to lead, or insecure in his ability to lead. If you nag and belittle him, you are being Satan’s strongest weapon in emasculating your husband.
Think about it: there is no one closer to your husband, no one who spends as much time with him or knows as much about him as his wife so the enemy will do everything he can to use you to work his will against your husband. And what is his will? To kill, steal, and destroy (John 10:10). Satan will use your selfishness against your husband. The devil will use your manipulative tactics to kill your husband’s confidence, to steal his joy, and destroy his effectiveness for God’s kingdom. The enemy does not want your husband to enjoy life with you and have it in abundance like Christ desires him to.
I cannot stress this enough because so many of us married people allow the sin of selfishness to make a home in our hearts and then, because of this sin, we give the enemy a foothold where he is now able to deceive our hearts because there’s parts in it that are darkened by disobedience. When we walk in obedience, the love and light of Christ fills our otherwise deceitful and wicked hearts (Jeremiah 17:9). Because of His light inside of us, we can see when we are sinning and therefore are able to deal with it rather than submit to it and have it overpower us. Paul gets very in depth with this truth in Romans chapter eight.
So, dear woman of God, do not use the manipulating tool of fighting until you win against your man. You might temporarily get what you want, but in the long run, you will get your most dreaded fear: a husband who cannot lead you.
Don’t break your husband down with your persistence. The Word says:
“Wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which in God’s sight is very precious.”-1 Peter 3:1-4
Do you want to be beautiful to both God and your husband? Then be quiet! Allow your respectful behavior to win your husband over, not your nagging persistence of which the Word says:
“It’s better to live alone in the corner of an attic than with a quarrelsome wife in a lovely home.” –Proverbs 21:9

Every man feels the same when we come at him with our manipulating persistence: I’d rather live alone in an attic than with this woman.
No Christian woman wants to be like the infamous wife of Job. The poor man is suffering, being under severe attack from Satan, and what does his wife do? Nag and belittle him:
“Do you still hold fast to your integrity [after everything you’ve been through]? Curse God and die!”-Job 2:9

Now we may not be saying those exact words, but we can be saying it the same way. Belittling and complaining/nagging are manipulative and destructive weapons. If we really want to win our husbands over, we need be patient with them, just as God was patient with us before coming to Him, and still is patient with us! Love suffers long (1 Corinthians 13:4).
Once you realize your husband isn’t your enemy and stop fighting him, true freedom will come to you both.

Got some toxic thoughts that are leading you to toxic behavior?

So, the past two months or so have been rough.  I allowed some financial strains to get the better of me at times.  The disappointment I deflected onto my husband caused me to question for a moment if I was bipolar.  One moment I’d be nice, the next I’d get snappy.  I allowed some toxic thoughts to become toxic emotions that then turned into toxic attitudes which inevitably led to toxic behavior.  The Bible talks about, “taking every thought captive.”  I know now the amazing benefits of this notion when truly applied.  It may seem weird at first, because how many of us think, about our thoughts?  We just let it flow: the thought (stage one) creates an emotion (stage two), then an attitude (stage three), then a behavior (stage four) and nowhere in between that process do we think to stop it at stage one.  Only 5% of us realize the negative thought will lead to other negative outcomes and that it needs to be stopped.  But most of us ignore the rising smoke until it’s turned into a wild-fire.  And that, it what happened to me.

Yesterday my husband told me something in regards to our finances.  Automatically, I got a thought, an emotion and an attitude, and just acted.  One, two, three, boom.  Just like that [totally ignored the advice James gives in the Bible, “be quick to hear, SLOW to speak and SLOW to get angry.”  It wasn’t until the silence after our raised voices and the down-trodden demeanor on my husband’s face did I realize I shouldn’t have acted on my emotion which was created by my thought.  I’m quick to forgive and say sorry, but he left for work quiet and hurt.  Married women, if you are in the situation I was in yesterday, occasionally or regulary, you need to apply this principle.  And here’s the simplest way I believe to start.

After praying, I went to work.  Quite quickly, with my mindset being completely focused on my job, I was totally fine with a smile on my face as usual.  I had written a verse down, “God, create a clean heart for me and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Restore the joy of Your salvation to me, and give me a willing spirit.”  I looked over it a few times during the day and determined that when I got home, I would write my hubby a letter.  Not so much an apology, although I threw an “I’m sorry,” in there, but more importantly, a letter of support and encouragement, a letter letting him know, no matter what I said that morning, I honor and respect him.  He knows I love him, even in that moment of anger, but what he did feel, was that I disrespected him and didn’t believe in him.  Wives, wanna be on the fast-track to divorce?  Start making your man feel like you don’t respect who he is.  I’m not saying divorce is all our faults, but in most cases, the blame goes both ways.  But see, like my pastor said, the day before I hurt my husband, we wives have the power to completely build up our man and make him feel like Captain America, or the power to completely destroy him and make him feel dishonorably discharged.

I sat down and wrote him a letter, conjuring up the memories at to why I fell in love with him and all the things about him that make him great and man oh man did that spark a change in me (a good fire).  When I spoke to my husband after I got of a meeting it was like the fight earlier never even happened.  I asked him if he recieved the letter and he sure did.  He was very pleased and was like, “You really think that?” That night we had a nice time in the bedroom as well =)) and shared some good laughs and prayed together before we went to sleep. So, I HIGHLY suggest if you have been fighting with your husband to write him a respect letter. Ask nothing of him, simply tell him what you respect him for and what you’re thankful of from him.  Then, when he does something you’re not too pleased with, take that thought captive.  I already had to do that and my did it help.  It was interesting, it was like fighting myself:

“The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions.”-Galatians 5:17

But, if you’re, “directed by the Spirit,” you’re not obligated to do those evil and hurtful actions towards others.  Start crowding out the bad thoughts with good ones.  How do you do that?

“Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”-Philippians 4:8

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”-Romans 1:2

In other words, it may sound old school, but read your Bible.  I suggest reading a chapter of Proverbs a day and writing down one or two verses that really speak to you.  And definitly check out what Jesus says and how he thinks and acts.  Talk about the perfect role-model and positive thinker.  He was called “Teacher” for a reason.  But even deeper than that, if you have only known Jesus as just that, simply a teacher, I suggest you cry out to Him and ask Him to be who He wants to be in your life.  With a simple invatation, He will change your world and the worlds around you.  This whole controlling your thoughts thing isn’t easy.  You need divine help.  But, like the religious leaders back then said to Jesus, “We know you are not a respecter of persons,” he really doesn’t care who you are, where you’ve been, or what you’re doing now, all He cares about is loving and wooing you.  Give Him a try and I promise, no matter how dark your world looks now, He will make it brighter than ever before.  God bless.