Fat Shaming Vs. Beauty Vs. Reality

Hey precious ladies. First, let me say being cruel or unkind or mocking someone because of their appearance is foolish and, well, mean. God via the Bible has lots to say about kindness and the words we speak.

I’ve seen plenty of what I believe to be beautiful plus-sized women who look great and healthy. Call them, “curvy” or “voluptuous,” they’re not “skinny” and that’s totally okay!

But just as there are some who are unhealthily skinny, there are some who are unhealthily overweight.

For example: I have a grandmother who is obese. She was always “big-boned” which was fine. I believe she lived a healthy life in her earlier years. But then she got remarried after divorcing my grandfather…

Her second husband, “Liked fat women,” so he encouraged her to eat up and eventually, she became 200+ lbs–and the number has climbed and climbed. Nine years ago, she almost died from a blood clot which had to do with her weight and immobility. Currently, my grandmother is basically bedridden. With swollen legs, very heavy and hard to move, getting out of bed is a serious workout and she’s fallen more often because of muscle weakness (again, laying in bed means no real exercise of her limbs and without strengthening by means of use, eventually, our bodies grow frail).

She’s been eating better, thanks to my sister who cares for her and has been trying to help her lose weight so she’s more healthy and mobile. But there are people in the family who say to let her be because she’s happy. In reality, she’s quite the opposite, and though eating junk-food and however much food she desires momentarily releases happy chemicals, doesn’t mean she is truly happy and if anything, it sure is a cheap happiness in comparison to the simple but greater happiness of being able to move around and do necessary things like walk to the restroom, bathe, and not be bed-bound. She’s terrified of falling and has grown all the more bound to her bed because of it.

Many Americans are what doctors call “obese” or unhealthily overweight. You don’t even have to be visibly that “fat” in order to have clogged arteries, diabetes, and the like, but the point is that, at a certain point, “fat” can be more easily defined as unhealthy or potentially unhealthy and when a person is medically obese, encouraging them to stay that way, applauding it, etc. isn’t helpful, but harmful…

How many young people suffer from asthma and diabetes, or die prematurely from a heart attack because of fat build up? Again, I’m not for mocking anyone, but I am for being lovingly honest and offering solutions to what sometimes is just ignorance of how unhealthy certain stuff really is, and the addictive chemicals and whatnot in those foods that keep you coming back for more, or often, over-eating stems from deep, unresolved issues so encouraging the person to continue being unhealthily overweight is also encouraging them to ignore the deeper reasons as to why they’re placing their comfort in food.

Now we can offer help and support without openly embarrassing someone. We should be able to voice any concerns if it’s done so with the genuine intent of helping another person. I appreciate those who are honest with me about my issues and sins and offer advice and help me get through. No one is perfect, but man, the honest words and assistance of others can be such a blessing.

So yes, let us be kind to one another, but let us also offer support and help those whose weight has gotten to the point of being problematic to their health, rather than encourage them to continue embracing an unhealthy lifestyle. Not everyone desires to be helped, but we still love them anyway. Our love shouldn’t be dependent upon a person taking our advice or not, love is unconditional, but it also gently speaks the truth.

blog_love_natasha

What are your thoughts on this topic? Feel free to leave a comment. ❤

I’m Thinking About Buying A New Body

“If we have a way of thinking that is contrary to Gods word , it’s an open door for the enemy.” -Pastor Robert Morris, Gateway Church

If you don’t like your body, you open the door for the enemy to come in and destroy your body. Cutting, drug abuse, reckless accidents, sexual immorality, obesity, over-working it, starving it etc.

“Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)

“Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy, and you are that temple.” (1 Corinthians 3:16, 17)

“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.” (Romans 12:1)

Ladies please hear me on this: when we say, “I hate my body, or I’m too short, or I don’t like my nose,” or whatever it is, we are saying, “God, I hate Your temple.” These bodies are not our own. They’re a gift from God and the Word says:

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” (Psalms 139:14)

If you have been abusing your body because you hate it, please repent or you will die before your time:

“Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.”(James 1:15)

It’s a sin to abuse God’s temple. Please take this seriously. God loves you and He is the one who formed you, who knit you together in your mother’s womb. Stop hating yourself, and begin to take care of the body God gave you so you can be effective for Him and be ready to face Him on that day, having ran your race well and to His desired end, not a premature one.

You’re loved.
You’re beautiful.
Because God says you are!

Know your worth princess,
❤ Princess Natasha

I can’t eat, and look at what she’s she wearing.

Ah, insecurity. That dreadful, dreadful word. I wish it were an object so I can stomp on it with my foot and then crush it with a falling piano or something.  As far as I’m concerned, EVERY girl walking this earth struggles with insecurity. Some more than others, but all in all, we all have dealt with it and will deal with it again some time in our lives.

I’m going to break this up into three different sections: Girls who struggle with insecurity sometimes, somewhat often, and every darn day. So you can skip the others and go straight to the section you relate to most.

“I’m pretty secure in my own skin. It’s only sometimes that I doubt my appearance.”

Fortunately for you, this is normal. I don’t think there’s a single woman out there who never feels insecure and if there is, give me her name and cell phone number. I’m very happy for you
that this isn’t much of a struggle for you. But do me a favor, encourage a girl you know suffers big with this. Let her know what you like or love about her and have her read psalm 139.

“I don’t obsess about my insecurities, but I’m definitely not confident.”

Find yourself at times comparing yourself to other women and finding in whatever it is your comparing, they got it better than you do? Here’s the thing, there’s always going to be a girl that’s
prettier or has a nicer body than you. But for every guy that likes that body-type and those features, there’s a guy that doesn’t. And here’s the best thing about that: the guy that’s for you
is going to be attracted to you and is going to want you, not the pretty thin blonde you’re comparing yourself to. I’ve had my moments where I knew my husband thought a girl was pretty, but since he’s a prince (a man who, because he has a relationship with God, loves, respects and treats me right), he doesn’t stare or even mention it to me. His eyes are right back on whatever it is he’s doing or on me and he never makes me feel like he wishes I was different in any way. When God places your prince in your path, he won’t make you feel that way either. Know that she has her own imperfections and insecurities as well and then force yourself to think of something else. Thank God for the eyes you have no matter how plain you think they are. Shoot, thank Him for the nose you have because some people don’t even have one of those! If you’re unhealthily overweight, stop moping and start exercising. Put down whatever it is that’s causing you to gain weight because it’s not good for your health or your mind (and get reflective. There may be a past hurt you are trying to numb with the pleasure you get from eating. Confront the past and know that Christ has defeated the devil’s works in your life. The past is past, and God can and wants to heal you so get real with Him about your pain). If you got some curves, some hips and a big booty, be grateful. There’s a girl with a small butt wishing she had yours.

“I hate the skin I’m in.”

Okay, those people who bullied you, are uglier than they ever called you and did so because they have their own issues they didn’t know how to deal with. The rejection you’ve felt from a father or mother had nothing to do with who you are. They were not mature, they were as selfish as selfish could be and probably went through rejection with their own family as well. Pray for them. Don’t internalize and personalize the rejection, externalize it and bring it up to God in prayer. Pray for their healing and for yours. Pray, pray, pray. I can’t stress this enough. Get around loving-people. If you don’t know where to find them, look for a church with a good reputation and check out some of their small groups (aka home groups) or youth groups. Whoever treats you wrongly, pray for them. Ask God to help you see yourself the way He does, not the way anyone else does. In the end, their opinion of you does not matter. You’re beautiful, prized, cherished and loved, not because they say so, but because God does. If you don’t believe me, I encourage you to pick up a Bible and check for yourself. If you’re thinking, “Well, I’m not Christian and don’t believe or am not sure if the Bible really is inspired by God,” I challenge you to read it anyway and see what the God of the Bible says about you. There’s lots of messed up religions out there that say you’re an evil alien that needs taming or you’re just an accidental animal with no purpose. The Bible says you were made in the image of God Himself and were created for the sole purpose of knowing Him, being loved by Him, loving
Him in return and loving others. That you do have a special and specific purpose that only God knows and you can know if you seek it out. You have gifts. Whether that be singing, writing, drawing, communicating, being an ace at math, a great organizer, whatever it is, you’re unique and specially designed. As my mom-in-law so beautifully put it, “Princesses come in all packages.”

With sincere love,

                              Natasha