Ladies, Is His Love Enough For You?

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Before starting on this post, I asked God what He wanted me to write to you ladies, and I heard Him whisper, “Just tell them about my love for them.”

I wrote a blog on my author website that focused on some truths I knew I should share with you. So I tweaked them as the Spirit led to hopefully shed light on just how intimately the Perfect Man in existence knows you and how fully He loves you.

1.) God thinks about you … all the time.

How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand; When I awake, I am still with You.-Psalms 139:17, 18

The God of the universe, the universe that contains billions of galaxies and stars, galaxies like the Milky Way which in light years (the length travelled by light in one year which is equal to 9,460,000,000,000 km) is 100,000 of those across, this God has you on His mind constantly.

2.) God watches you all the time.

You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path and my lying down, And are acquainted with all my ways.-Psalms 139:2, 3

He sees everything you do and everything you go through. He cares about your every breath and your every step. He literally catches every tear from the amazing eyes He gave you:

You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.-Psalms 56:8 NLT

3.) God listens to you.

When Christ, the perfect Son of God, died on that Roman cross at Golgotha 2,000 years ago and then rose from the dead three days later (witnessed by over five hundred people alive during that time), He became the Mediator, the High Priest by which we humans can enter the presence of Almighty God and make request of Him.

So then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.-Hebrews 4:14-16 NLT

Not only does God listen to you, but check this out:

And when he took the scroll, the four living beings and the twenty-four elders fell down before the Lamb. Each one had a harp, and they held gold bowls filled with incense, which are the prayers of God’s people.-Revelation 5:8 NLT

Then another angel with a gold incense burner came and stood at the altar. And a great amount of incense was given to him to mix with the prayers of God’s people as an offering on the gold altar before the throne. The smoke of the incense, mixed with the prayers of God’s holy people, ascended up to God from the altar where the angel had poured them out.-Revelation 8:3, 4 NLT

Your prayers are so precious to Him, He has them presented to Him in golden bowls by angels, and your prayers are mixed with amazing smelling incense.

4.) God knows you intimately.

When a woman says: “no one knows me better than my husband” she is wrong.

There is no greater, no deeper kind of intimate knowledge than the knowledge God has of us.

He knows every centimeter of your outer frame:

But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.-Luke 12:7

He knows every centimeter of your inner frame:

For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb.-Psalms 139:13

And He declares you beautiful:

You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.-1 Peter 3:4 NLT

Listen to me, O royal daughter; take to heart what I say. Forget your people and your family far away. For your royal husband delights in your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord. The bride, a princess, looks glorious in her golden gown. In her beautiful robes, she is led to the king …-Psalms 45:10, 11, 13, 14 NLT

Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.-Psalms 139:14 NLT

He knows your every thought:

You understand my thought afar off.-Psalms 139:2

For there is not a word on my tongue, But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether.-Psalms 139:4

But Jesus knew their thoughts …”-Matthew 12:25, 9:4, Luke 5:22, 9:37 (and several more!)

And He knows your heart:

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”-1 Samuel 16:7

And Jesus said to them, “You are those who justify yourselves before men, but God knows your hearts.-Luke 16:15

And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.-Hebrews 4:13

5.) God loves you

Your Heavenly Creator sees your every move, hears your every word, knows your every thought and motive yet still He loves you.

Can you imagine if you had a projector strapped to your head that was able to expose your every thought and motive 24/7 and you had to walk around with it and could never take it off? How many people would still love you? Maybe a few people would last a while, but what if they had to live with you 24/7 and go everywhere you go, in public and behind every closed door? Would they still love you then? Would they die for you?

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.-John 3:16

When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners. Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation. For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.-Romans 5:6-11 NLT

Jesus loves you. You are His most prized possession. Sit in His presence today and just ask Him to please help you understand more fully the depth of His intimate love for you.

For more on all that Jesus has done for you, check out this post .

Please feel free to share your thoughts in a comment. I love hearing from you princesses.

“I’m ten and I pose topless like my grown-up media icons do.”


Down the road regret is something that awaits the person who thinks, “I’m young so I’m just gonna have fun and live it up.”
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not bad to have fun, but there is a right kind of a fun and a wrong kind of fun. There’s fun that costs you ten bucks and then there’s “fun” that takes more than you bargained for, e.g. losing your virginity for the first time.

I have yet to meet a girl who does not regret losing their virginity [before marriage] to the guy they lost it to or the time they chose to do it. Not. One.

Maybe you’re reading this and thinking, “I don’t regret losing my virginity when I did.” Maybe not enough time has passed for the consequences of your decision to manifest clearly. Whatever the case may be, we ladies especially, can tend to make lots of emotionally based decisions that we end up regretting.

I write this because I want you to be done with the regrets. Living a life of regret is not a healthy one. I drank myself silly (or till blackness), more than a few times when I decided to illegally drink at the age of eighteen.

Do I wish I never did any of those things, yeah of course. Blacking out because of alcohol is something I pray my future children never do. How about all the loser guys I dated? O boy, how much heartache I would have spared myself if I chose to just wait for the right guy.

We see dating, sex, drinking–all these things people are doing at younger and younger ages–and get blinded to the effects of these activities. Thanks to the majority of media and the people they set up as icons, ten-year-old’s are starting to have sex with each other.

Look at how little girls are dressing and dancing. Yes it’s the parents’ fault as well, they can somewhat monitor what their kids watch, but honestly, they cannot monitor what enters their child’s mind 24/7 unless they lock their kids up inside all day and hover their every move.

The sex message is everywhere. Don’t want your kid or little five-year-old sister to wanna be sexy, don’t take them to a mall. In Aventura Mall, one of the largest and most popular malls in America, you don’t have to step one foot inside of Victoria’s Secret to see a sexy half-naked model. She’s taking up part of an entire wall from top to bottom shouting, “Look at me, come inside, buy what I’m wearing, be sexy.

Don’t take them to Abercrombie or Ruehl or more than half of the other stores in the mall either if you don’t want them to see nude pictures that are just barely revealing what’s supposed to be the “private parts” of their models. Private parts. I haven’t even heard that term in years! It’s like nothing is private anymore, nothing is special, nothing is forbidden, nothing is off limits.

I plead with you, young or even older woman alike reading this blog to think twice about growing up fast. Your body is sacred. Call it a holy word, I say it’s simply a truth you need to know about yourself. Yes, many people are–sadly enough–flashing their goods like it’s all dandy, but deep down, you know there’s something demeaning in that, something that doesn’t seem right for a ten-year-old to pose with top off and pants pulled down to one side in front of a camera for the world to see? Doesn’t that picture of that little girl topless tick you off? What happened to little girls wanting to be like Cinderella and Belle? Now it seems little girls want to be like Lady Gaga and Beyonce instead.

Will some real role models please stand up? Where are you? Are you out there? Can you fight the current and do what’s right? Can you be a princess, someone little girls can mimic without having to compromise their innocence?

Think before you do, before you try, before you, “have some fun.” There’s little eyes watching you. Little girls are looking for role models, especially if they don’t have a good one at home. Do you want them to walk around like another mini-Beyonce and have sick old men undressing them with their eyes? After seeing images like these, although I’m not condoning it, I can understand why there’s so many pedophiles out there.

Please ladies, stand up and be the princess icons our younger generation needs. I beg you. I’m a princess. I will make sure I act accordingly knowing that when I step out of my house, I’m influencing someone.

What are your thoughts on all this? Please feel free to share them in a respectful manner in a comment.

“How far can I go with my boyfriend?”

I love the way Sy Rogers put it, “If you haven’t taken the risk and responsibility of marriage you’re not entitled to any reward, therefore, if on a date you can’t do it in front of your mommy and daddy you probably shouldn’t do it at all in my opinion.”

If a guy isn’t your husband, he should be treating you with respect and purity.  “Oh please, that is so old English times, Natasha. Guys now-a-days don’t treat girls with that kind of respect.”  Um, maybe not the ones you’ve been dating, but trust me, honey, they’re out there and I married one and so did my friend Kate, Kelly, Kayza and now my friend Melissa is engaged to one, just to name a few.  I’ve even met women who were engaged to men in their late thirties who respected their bodies until their wedding day!  They’re out there, princess and if you haven’t encountered one, start praying about it and just watch what happens.

“I want to wait till marriage, but I find it difficult to.”

Look, I know you have raging hormones, but they can be controlled.  The only way to put fire out is to pour some water on it.  An easy way to do this is to, “Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure,” -Philippians 4:8.  Don’t set your mind on how hot your boyfriend is and how you just love kissing him and want to touch him so darn bad.  When you hang out, hang out in public and/or with others and do something productive so your mind is focused and engaged in something rather than your boyfriend.  Really contemplate the negatives to being sexually involved with him.  Trust me, there’s plenty.  It won’t take you too long to come up with a few.  Google some statistics on teenage pregnancy and STDs.

If you want to treat your body as worth the wait till you marry a man that meets high standards, start practicing boundaries.  There’s really nothing wrong with them.  If there were no laws, this world would be unimaginably worse than it is now.  Boundaries are a good thing.  Never let your sexuality roam free before you’re married.  It will get you into a lot of trouble.  I know too many girls who have and now live with the consequences of a sexual life before marriage.    Don’t be another statistic.

With love and concern,

Natasha

Even Christian girls are selling themselves short

So this weekend my hubby and I celebrated our first anniversary as a married couple in Orlando at Universal Studios and Rock the Universe (Biggest Christian concert of the year).  While at Rock the Universe I saw a few girls with boys, kissing and what have you, but one girl’s relationship didn’t appear very innocent.

We were in line for Shrek 4D and this young girl, most likely in high school, was standing behind us with her guy-friend.  She cursed a bit as they conversed, her arms wrapped around his neck.  This did bother me a bit because she is at an overtly Christian concert yet swearing, but this isn’t what inspired me to write a blog to you ladies.  As we moved ahead in line, I looked back and caught her boyfriend grabbing her chest from behind and she laughed nonchalantly.  Maybe she wasn’t a Christian, she just liked the bands, but either way, Christian or not, this girl was being disrespected and laughing about it.

Some of you girls are crying about the disrespect guys are treating you with and some of you are laughing while they do it.  This is most likely due to a lack of knowledge on how a man should treat a woman who isn’t his wife.  Maybe this young girl’s mom or dad never taught her what not to put up with or how to set standards for herself and view herself as worth waiting for till marriage.  I wouldn’t be the least bit shocked if this were the case.  Or maybe they did, but somewhere along the line (probably sometime in high school), she started hanging with the wrong crowd or with girls who were just as clueless about their worth as she was.  This is why, if you’re reading this and are maybe just a freshman in high school, it is very important to choose your friends wisely.  You might’ve already chose some friends who were promiscuous because you thought it was cool or saw the acceptance they seemed to attain from other students.  Well, these girls get attention yes, but for the wrong reasons.

Too many times in my high school days (which wasn’t very long ago), girls were known for being a “slut, hoe, loose goose, trick,” etc.  Question:  is this what you want to be known for and referred to???  Trust me, girl, that’s what people are saying and especially the boys.  You may be thinking, “Well, that’s what I want:  the boys to talk about me.”  Here’s a tip:  NO YOU DON’T!  I knew a girl who unfortunately had to leave her school because the torment she received from all the bad names she was called because of the lies spread by an ex.  If she never went out with a disrespectful guy, that may not have happened.  Key point:  do not settle and sell yourself short for guys that are going to have sex with you and then tell everyone and their mom’s about it.

When guys talk to guys about the girls they have sex with (and I don’t care what he tells you, he’s sharing), you’d think they were talking about a stray dog.  They put you on blast and all the other guys will simply want to use you like their homeboy did.  You don’t want this kind of attention, princess.  You’re too priceless for that.  You don’t want a whole bunch of guys houndin’ you anyway.  You want a special and great prince to be eyeing you and considering asking you out.  You want this prince to be talking to his friends like, “There’s this girl who’s beautiful, she’s like an angel so different from all the other girls.” My husband told his brother something similar when he met me.  What an honor it was to hear my brother-in-law tell me on our wedding day the beautiful and honoring things my husband told him about me when he met me.

Honor yourself, esteem yourself as worth more and don’t allow any wiggle room for people to label you as a slut.  Honor yourself and others will honor you.  Disrespect yourself and others will disrespect you.  (If someone happends to be disrespecting you for no reason, ignore it;  what’s hidden will always be made known.  Their lies will come to nothing.  You and God know who you are).  Make standards for yourself and a guy will come into your path who meets those standards.  Don’t be a follower:  lead your girlfriends into being princesses, worthy of respect and honor.  If they’d rather continue being known for their promiscuity, ditch ’em.  Let them be and just pray for them.  Then find some girlfriends that are respecting themselves and waiting for their prince.  You won’t regret it.

With concern and compassion,

Natasha

I’m not a princess. How do I undo what I’ve become?

WARNING:  This blog is only for girls who feel ashamed, guilty, uncertain of who they are, unhappy with who they’ve become and want change.

FOOTNOTE:  When I employ the term ‘princess’ I don’t mean a snobby, spoiled, rich girl.  I mean a beautiful, invaluable, precious gem.  Now let’s begin.

So many of us grew up on the Disney fairy tales.  Most of us have a favorite princess.  Mine is Cinderella and Princess Aurora (Sleeping Beauty).  Cinderella was not only stunning, but she had this remarkable humility and kindness that was absolutely admirable.  She is definitely an ideal role model.  I love her for her heart.  Despite her childhood tragedies and unfortunate circumstances, she did not allow bitterness to fester and grow in her heart.  She found the joy in everyday life, singing with birds and doing her chores with glee.  She had hope that one day, things would get brighter.  And her hope did not let her down.  And what I loved about Sleeping Beauty wasn’t so much Aurora, although to me, she was the most beautiful princess of them all, but her prince.   He definitely gave the other princes a run for their money.  Prince Philip didn’t just show up at the end and save her with a kiss or give her a lift in a chariot, he sacrificed his very life for her.  He faced the most dangerous obstacles and the most treacherous enemy of his lifetime to rescue his sleeping princess.  He was a hero.

When we reflect on our favorite princesses we remember hoping to someday be in her shoes with a prince charming of our own.  But what happened?  If you’re like me in any way, shape or form, you were either tricked by a frog dressed as a prince or knew the guy was a frog, but gave him a chance anyway.  And after that first break-up, things seemed to go down-hill from there.  Frog after frog kept hopping into your life, leaving you bruised and broken without much hope for a future prince.  These guys or maybe just one, hurt you or used you or mistreated you in a way that made you feel devalued.  Where you’re at now, is not where you saw yourself then.  Well, aren’t you in the perfect position for a knight to ride in on a white horse and sweep you off your feet.

When Cinderella and Aurora were in their darkest time in life, that’s when a prince came walking into their path.  Now, there’s a slight addition into the sequence of the plot that isn’t mentioned in these tales.  Before you can be with a prince, you have to become a princess and here’s the clincher:  the prince doesn’t make you the princess.  A King does.

Merely three and a half months before I met my husband, I was not a princess.  I was a hopeless, angry, hurt, serial dater with a broken heart.  I was so broken by guys trampling on my heart I believed I would never have a fairytale ending, that the story of my life would end with me being miserably single.  My last ex was the topper on that not-so-delightful cake.  I gave him every ounce of love and emotion I could muster and he threw it back at me.  The guy I had made my everything had just left me with nothing.  It was in that place that I finally looked up.  Literally.

I cried out while on my bed late at night, alone in my room, for God to speak to me.  And speak to me He did.  My life changed in an instant.  In the midst of my most hopeless moment, I received a glimmer of hope.  The next morning was brighter.  Although I still cried most of the day, every time the pain became almost unbearable, God poured out His love on me and eased the hurt.  Before a full week passed, I had completely stopped crying and started smiling.  It was truly a miracle.  My heart, that was completely shattered, was whole.  As I drew closer to Him and got to know Him better, I got to know myself.  I got to know what I truly was in God’s eyes.  I was dearly loved.  I was special.  I had a unique purpose.  I was a princess.

When I realized this, when being single didn’t even matter anymore because my joy was finally complete in Him, that’s when my prince charming came riding along.  And boy oh boy, did he put every frog before him to utter shame.  He was more than I could have asked for, thought of, or imagined.  Yet still, in all his beauty, he did not, does not, and never will compare to God.  I pray if you are in the shoes I once walked, you cry out to the King and discover the princess you were created to be.

(Here’s a song that God used to ease the pain one of the days before the week was over when my heart was still being mended.  I hope it helps. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53OQxfL0cNg)

“Why men love b**ches.” Why this is a lie.

Just ask a guy, “Do you love B words?” Tell me how many of them say yes. Girls that try to control a man or dominate a man, they will get harsh resistance or create a submissive whimp. Both extremes are undesirable. When we disrespect a man by acting like we’re PMSing, we pierce him in the deepest place of his heart. A man’s ultimate need is to be respected. When we deny him of that respect, we mine as well spit in his face and call him a loser. Choosing to refrain from respecting a man is the equivalent to if a man refused to love you. To put it plainly, if you try to get him to satisfy your deepest need [love] by denying him of his [respect], you’re doomed to failure. The sum of your relationship will be defined by fights, frustration, disappointment, doubt, confusion, pain and resentment.

If you don’t want any of the above, stay tuned.

HOW TO GET A MAN TO LOVE YOU – NOT JUST BY WORD, BUT BY DISPLAY

“R.E.S.P.E.C.T.” – You know the famous song by Aretha Franklin.  What you may not know however, is that is was originally written by a man.  So, the primary ingredient in getting a man to love you in actions is to respect him.  How to do this is key to know.  Every woman knows how to love, but most all have difficulty displaying respect.  Frankly, we never even think of the word in regards to our men.  I never once thought about respect in regards to Jonathan [my husband] before I read this book “Love & Respect” by Dr. Emerson Eggrichs.  Suddenly, it was as if the scales had fallen from my eyes.  I discovered, not only is showing my man respect somewhat unnatural, but displaying disrespect was more natural and a lot easier to do.

LEARN HOW TO SPEAK WITH RESPECT

POP QUIZ:  Have you ever said something to your man, either in public or in private and suddenly see his face fall, have him snap at you, fall silent, become cold or walk away?  Congratulations, you made him feel disrespected.

We ladies, seriously have to guard our tongues.  We’re super open, which can be a good thing, but it can also be a disaster.  For instance, when we’re hurt by our man, feeling neglected or unloved, we tend to let him know.  Now, it’s not wrong to let him know, BUT you can be wrong in the way you say it.

EXAMPLES:  THE WRONG WAY

The Accuser

“Michael, you haven’t come to see me in like two days, what have you been doing? Are you too busy for me or something? What’s wrong with you? Tell me!”

The Complainer

“Michael, I haven’t seen you in two days. I think it’s totally rude. You always made so much time for me before, but now it’s like you could care less and you’re super busy. I feel like I don’t mean crap to you.”

The Cry baby

Says the same thing the complainer does, but instead of attitude, she uses tears.

EXAMPLE:  THE RIGHT WAY

“Hey Michael. We haven’t seen each other in a few days and I feel unloved. Did I do something to make you feel disrespected?”

When you calmly address the issue and use the term “I feel” instead of accusing him, you keep your man  calm and collected and more open to hearing you out.  When you throw the term “disrespected” in there, you let him know you’re not pointing any fingers, that you simply want a solution that works for the both of you.

LEARN HOW TO ARTICULATE RESPECT

Your man needs to know what it is that you respect about him.  Don’t just assume he knows, tell him.  Think about some things you find respectful and share that with him:  his work ethic, his promptness, his reliability, his intelligence, his creativity, his compassion, his strength.  This simple act of telling him what you respect about him can radically change his countenance and character and your relationship.  We, in the area of encouragement, have the most power than anyone in our man’s life.  Whoever said, “Behind every great man there’s a great woman,” is oh so wise.  There should be one that says, “And behind every loser there’s a nagging woman.” When we talk-down to our men, we stomp on their hearts and crush their potential for greatness.  Let’s start being their cheerleaders and watch them blossom into the wonderful heroes they were created to be.

LEARN HOW TO SHOW RESPECT

If we only speak with respect, but don’t act with it, we don’t fool anyone, especially not our prince.  For example, you tell your man how much you respect him, but then flirt with the guys at your job or even worse, his own friends.  Or, you tell him you respect him, but then try to control what he does.  Telling and showing go hand in hand.  We cheerlead them on as we give them the freedom to pursue their dreams.  We tell them we honor their intelligence while letting them figure out solutions to practical problems (even if we already know a good solution) and letting them think for themselves.  I’ve been guilty of saying, “Yeah that’s a good idea,” yet implementing my own.  That’s not displaying true respect.  Men were made to be heroes, knights in shining armor.  They were built bigger and stronger and more masculine for a reason.  We can’t fight all their battles for them or we emasculate them.  We also have to let them fight some of our’s on our behalf so they can receive the joy of feeling needed and appreciated.  I’m burdened by women who step in front of their men and say, “I got this, baby, get behind me.”  When we do that, we’re telling them they aren’t needed.  Men have this natural inclination to lead, protect and accomplish.  We can be the princesses they do those things for or we can be lone cowgirls, taking down bad guys by our lonesome with no handsome prince to snatch us up in his chariot and carry us away into an adventure.

The key to unlocking the valiant knight in your man is respect.  You decide what you want to be to your man and he’ll play the role that coincides with it.  Choose wisely.